Oh my. Here is the big Britney Spears “comeback” performance at the 2007 MTV Video Music Awards:
Holy crap. It really was that bad. How sad.
MTV gave Britney Spears a HUGE chance to redeem her career by being the OPENING act for one of the biggest awards shows and she stumbled around the stage in an outfit she really shouldn’t being wearing and sort of tried to lip-synch. Proceed to Insert nails in to career coffin…
Honestly I think the funniest part is when the cameras pan to the audience (P-Diddy, 50-Cent, Rhianna, etc) and they’re all looking around like Ashton Kutcher is going to jump out and yell, “Y’ALL GOT PUNK’D!”. Unfortunately it wasn’t a joke. Yikes.
Here’s a video of Britneys VMA performance in 2000. Big difference…
The song was actually made as a Saturday Night Live skit, which is so so so funny, but it’s almost as funny that it won a serious music award. “Dick in a Box” won a Creative Arts Emmy for Outstanding Original Music And Lyrics. Awesome…haha.
The music and lyrics of “Dick in a Box” are by Justin Timberlake (music & lyrics), Jorma Taccone (music & lyrics), Katreese Barnes (music), Asa Taccone (music), Akiva Schaffer (lyrics), Andy Samberg (lyrics).
Today I finally put up my stripper pole and it is AWESOME. I actually really like the Platinum Stages Super Pole, it’s quite good quality and super sturdy, but then again, it better be for $400…It was easy to set up and only took 5 – 10 minutes.
Pole dancing is so much fun and a super good workout. It’s sort of like pilates on steroids. I picked it up no problem and I can already feel soreness in my arm, abs, butt and thighs. The best thing is that there are always more advanced moves to learn in order to keep the workout interesting, so I won’t get bored. I wonder how long it will take me to end up pulling these moves off:
You have to check out this video too. These girls are amazing. And after seeing that I want to put a full sound system and lighting in the gym in Puerto Rico…;)
I think beauty pageants are pretty ridiculous to begin with, but this is pretty hilarious. At the Miss Teen USA Pageant, Miss South Carolina, Lauren Caitlin, was asked the following question:
“A recent poll showed that 1/5th of Americans can’t find the USA on a world map and why do you think this is?”
And her amazing answer:
Lauren Caitlins answer: “I personally believe that U.S. Americans are unable to do so because, uhmm, some people out there in our nation don’t have maps and uh, I believe that our, I, education like such as uh, South Africa, and uh, the Iraq, everywhere like such as, and I believe that they should, uhhh, our education over here in the US should help the U.S., umh, should help South Africa, it should help the Iraq and the Asian countries so we will be able to build up our future, for us.”
The only sentance that I can decipher is: “I personally believe that U.S. Americans are unable to do so because, uhm, some people out there in our nation don’t have maps.” Although it’s not a very good sentance, or answer for that matter, she would have been better off stopping right there…
Even better? Miss South Carolina placed in the Miss Teen USA contest after that stellar answer.
Speaking of “beauty pageants”, what the hell is up with them anyways? It’s more like a contest of who can get the most plastic surgery and who can pretend the most convincingly that they give a shit about global warming or even know what they are talking about (see above quote). I especially like how you can not be Miss America if you have children or are married, but you can go get a nose job and breast implants. It sounds like Donald Trump and his partners (the owners of the Miss America Pageant) made up the Miss America criteria in order to parade around a bunch of pretty, available women for them to choose from.
I can see it now, a bunch of ugly rich men sitting around talking: “Let’s see, how can we get hot chicks to hang out with us? How about we spend a bunch of money on a lavish pageant where the criteria for entry is open only to beautiful, young, unmarried women. *laughing* That will totally work, Donald. Chicks are suckers for that shit. Make sure you throw in the rules that they can’t have kids or an abortion either, I don’t want to bang a slut. Also make it clear that we’re okay with plastic surgery. Can we sneak something in there about requiring breast implants? No? Okay, good enough…”
Edit: After watching the video of Miss South Carolina again, did anyone else notice that Mario Lopez did her a favor by cutting her off? Haha…Nice move. Mario is a pro.
I heard about RealDolls quite a few years ago, via The Howard Stern Show. Long story short, a RealDoll is the most realistic sex doll ever made. They are fully customized to the customers requests (you can pick the RealDolls features, skintone, cup size, tan lines and other things I won’t get into…) and they cost a few thousand dollars. They are so realistic, it’s scary. Here is an actual RealDoll:
Like I said before, RealDolls are old news and while I think they are creepy I can appreciate the artistry and engineering that goes into making a RealDoll. Now, HERE is what really brought out the creep factor for me…You have to see this documentary:
“Guys and Dolls” is a documentary about guys that have “real” relationships with their RealDolls. Can you say mental illness much? My favorite parts:
Davecat from Michigan: “I think, um, the part my father finds really difficult about my realtionship with Chishann (his RealDoll) is the fact that she’s not alive, that she’s not a human being. He sees it as something unnatural and strange…When she first came into my life it was just sex, sex, sex, sex, but now it’s just tapered off so that we’re just there for each other. We’re always there for each other…”
Another good part is where “Gordon” starts showing off his collection of guns (a glock, a shotgun, a semi-automatic) and a twohanded broad sword. Which wouldn’t be so bad if the guy didn’t look/sound like a complete nut job. Here’s a clip of Gordon and his RealDolls, where he rattles off the reasons why RealDolls are better then women. Basically because prostitution is illegal where he lives and they’ll impound his truck….ooookay….
Madonna really is truely a badass. The fact that she has remained on top of her game for 20+ years is something that I can’t say I’ve seen ANY other artist do. She has reinvented herself and her music so many times, but each change has been totally appropriate and still “Madonna”.
Check out her “Like a Virgin” video from the 80′s:
Now check out Madonna performing “Like a Virgin” on her latest tour:
I still have no idea what I’m going to tell the judge tomorrow. I think I’m just going to have to be honest and tell him that I’m completely floored and don’t know what he wants me to tell him. According to the jury I’m a liar that goes out and gets wasted, throws tantrems, trespasses and fights police officers for no reason. Anyone that actually knows me is probably falling off their chair laughing at that description. In truth, I’m the most mellow person that rarely goes out, let alone hangs out in bars. I’m often the designated driver when I go out with friends and when I’m not, I’m notorious for sneaking home to go back to work. If I had actually commited a crime, this would be so much easier…
Any how, I’ve been trying to turn around the way I’ve been feeling and I’ve been trying to focus on the positive things I have going for me. I have an amazing family, boyfriend and future. I don’t want to become a cynical, negative person just because I’ve seen the seedy, disgusting dark side of the justice system. Today, I tried out iMovie for the 1st time and put together this video for Stefan and my California 2 Puerto Rico blog:
I’ve found yet another reasons why PC’s/Microsoft sucks… I just spent 3 hours driving around town looking for some stupid software program. And guess, what…I STILL DON’T HAVE IT. I went to microsoft.com and they told me that Staples, Fry’s and Comp USA all carry the program I’m looking for. WELL NONE OF THEM DO!!! You would think that Microsoft would understand how import it is to keep your website up to date, but apparently not.
I have NEVER had to drive around town looking for software for any of my Macs. Macs just come with everything you need and if you do need a special program, you can just download it from Apple.com.
Microsoft has wasted so much of my time, it’s retarded.
